My new life: "Sorry it's such an inconvenience!"

 I became vegan the day after Christmas. I told my family and friends of my decision and got mixed reviews (as expected of course!) A week later, I went to a family dinner where I could literally eat nothing there.  This of course met with sarcasm, criticism, and jokes (none of which I minded.)

I am a good sport and know that not everyone understands or agrees with my new lifestyle! I mean, "different" is scary to a lot of people... me included.

Along the past several weeks, I have come up against a lot of tough questions.  The easiest question to answer is: "Why would you want to do something like that?" I always reply "Simply put, to save my life. I have seen that a vegan lifestyle can drastically improve autoimmune disease symptoms." I have recognized that it does come out almost robotic at this point--but I have had to say it a lot!  Again, not minding.  I love to share with people what I am doing and how it is making me feel (or I wouldn't have started this blog!)

Other questions I often encounter (and their respective answers):
"But you need meat and dairy, don't you? All humans do!"  No, you don't need meat. It has been proven time and time again that humans do not need meat.  In fact, there are groups of people in the world who still do not eat meat OR dairy and they have less (virtually no) cases of cancer and other diseases. Read "The China Study" by T. Colin Campbell or watch "Forks over Knives".

"Aren't you going to be low in all kinds of vitamins?"  Actually, some of my vitamin levels are higher than ever. The one vitamin you cannot get from a plant based diet is B12 but it is very rare to get a B12 deficiency because our body produces enough for us. Plus, there are those handy supplements and fortified rice milk, cereals, etc...  For peace of mind.

"Don't you miss cheese? You used to live on cheese!"  And we wonder how I had cholesterol way over 200... Yes I miss it, I did love it, but toward the end of our love affair, I realized just how gross it was.

"You aren't going to force your son and husband to eat like this, are you?"  My son doesn't like meat anyway. I let him drink milk for now, but I am going to introduce him to rice milk, which is delicious. It is fortified with calcium and other vitamins as well. For now, this picky eater gets a lot of protein from his peanut butter toast. As for my husband, the deal with him is the only cheese in the home is bleu cheese (which he loves and I loathe) and he can have as much meat as he desires if he cooks it. He is cooking up a lot and throwing it in the freezer. But he said he honestly hasn't even noticed the lack of meat as I have been making hearty meals with beans, veggies, rice, etc...

There are so many other things I have heard along the way thus far.  But the most important thing to me is that I have piqued a lot of people's interest.  I consider it spreading seeds.  I am just living my life, and planting seeds of interest in other people.  I have some doubters who have come back a week later and said something like "I have been thinking about this thing you are doing... and I want to know more about it."

I guess the fact that I have lost 10 lbs since, doesn't hurt...

I announced on my facebook that I was down 60 lbs since my heaviest weight.  Boy if that didn't generate a lot of interest.  I was overwhelmed with the support and love that I received in return as well.  These are people who have watched my struggle.  I don't think any of them knew how bad it all was, but I am slowly leaking more details out as they are each resolved. 

The most annoying response I ever received was from people who said, "Well what am I supposed to feed you when you come over?  I just won't bother trying to feed you I guess."  My response to this has been fairly simple.  "JUST ASK ME!" 

I don't understand why people can't just ask me what I DO eat rather than focusing on all the things I do not eat.  It is very simple to understand what I eat: beans (excluding soy), nuts (excluding soy nuts), vegetables, and fruits, olive oil, grains and rice... how is that hard to understand?  Or is it that it isn't "convenient" because it isn't what you eat? 

So, I'm sorry I don't eat pork, potatoes smothered in butter and sour cream, or snack cakes.  But really?  I mean, order me a tomato pie if it's that inconvenient--but please make sure they don't use egg or milk in their dough and don't put cheese on it.  Throw some mushrooms on it and you have my favorite "treat" dinner.  Or just have a salad available.  Always the safest bet.  Just don't put dressing on it, let me choose my own. 

If other people can have substitutions and exclusions at restaurants, why can't I? Why can't I ask them to "hold the cheese" without getting an eye roll from someone sitting at my table.  Why can't I ask if something has milk in it without getting an exasperated sigh from the peanut gallery? 

When I first found out about my soy allergy (which gives me severe hives up my neck into my lips and ears) I received the same courtesy from people.  I try explaining it is a matter of life and death but can you believe that even after almost three years living soy free, some people still don't believe me?  "But you used to eat this stuff all the time!"  Yes, but three years ago, I was having hives, trouble breathing, and severe stomach problems every day!  But now I am not, unless I unknowingly eat something with soy or pea protein in it.  Why is this so hard for some people to understand?  No, it is not in my head, it is in my body. 

I am sorry that my allergy and my diet is such an inconvenience to some people, but I am much happier without that stuff in my body.  I believe there is a reason I went through a three week detox after I stopped eating all that nonsense.  I believe there is a reason my skin went into cystic acne trying to excrete all of the toxins, and why I could hardly leave a bathroom.  Because now, I feel like a different person. 

I am truly awake for the first time in years.  My body is slowly "getting the bugs out" and my Sjogren's symptoms have decreased in intensity. I never have heartburn anymore (which I used to have every day) and rarely have panic attacks (which also used to be every day).  I feel happier, lighter (literally and figuratively), and brighter.  I have had three different doctors look at me after not seeing me for around three months and say "what have you been doing? Your skin looks bright and you look great!  One of my doctors is even eliminating dairy himself!

I say to skeptics: try it yourself.  Then tell me it is so wrong.

Hello, it's nice to meet you...

Self discovery... self healing... self pity... self loathing...
We lift ourselves up, we put ourselves down...

Merriam-Webster's website definition of "Self":
1: a: the entire person of an individual b: the realization or embodiment of an abstraction
3: the union of elements (as body, emotions, thoughts, and sensations) that constitute the individuality and identity of a person. [http://i.word.com]

So the identity of the entire self can be defined by totalling the contributions made by the body, mind and spirit... interesting.

Let me give you a little introduction to myself.

I am a 26 years old stay-at-home mom with a B.A. in English and an Esthetics license.  I was laid-off over two years ago and despite having applied to several hundred jobs (not even joking), I am still home with my wonderful little boy.  I have been struggling with my health for most of my life. Not just my weight--that has actually been a more recent struggle (dating back about 8 years now).  As a child, I struggled with a pretty severe tachycardia which was resolved (or so we thought) by a catheter procedure in 1996.  Thereafter I struggled with self loathing--as most teenagers do.  I deprived myself of food for a small time, but equally as serious: deprived myself of love.  I struggled with cystic acne which depleted my spirits of any confidence. After trying just about every medication and cream possible, a short encounter with a vegan diet cleared my face up considerably.  This was ended quickly due to my love affair with cheese.

In college, the love affair continued. I gained weight--rapidly.  Binge eating and finding comfort through consumption was how I got through every day.  When I met the wonderful man who is now my husband, I had gained a lot of weight (and he had just lost 60 lbs). He instantly saw through my extra poundage and my panic disorder and fell in love with me. Love didn't mean that he was going to just let me drown myself in Parmesan.  He is by no means an enabler. Some have commented that he is too critical... but that is just what this ol' slacker needed.

Soon after meeting the man of my dreams, I started coming down with weird symptoms. I thought it was just my panic disorder making me a hypochondriac, but I started seeking out doctors anyway. A gastroenterologist for my stomach pains, and other issues, a cardiologist for my heart palpitations, a pulmonologist for a tightness in my chest, an neurologist for cognitive slowness and inability to focus... the list goes on and on. My family doctor has grown to know me too well.  And through all the testing we discovered that at my young age, I had cholesterol higher than most 40+ year old men and fatty liver disease. They accused me of binge drinking (which is completely the opposite of the truth; I hardly drink.)  I however accused cheese of being the biggest offender but kept up the love affair anyway.  I did, however go vegetarian.  And after discovering a severe soy allergy, went soy free as well.  I lost 50 lbs within 10 months from this combination.  But the story continues...

This past November, almost 7 years since the start of my symptoms, my family doctor decided to test me again for autoimmune diseases--this time adding in Sjogren's Disease.  My mom and uncle both have Multiple Sclerosis and so I potentially had a higher risk for an autoimmune disease. Oddly enough, he called me while I was sitting at Burger King with my son eating a large pack of fries. When I saw his number come up on my cell phone, I knew he had an answer.  He told me I had tested positive for a Sjogren's antibody--and he suspected I had fibromyalgia as well.  I had never heard of Sjogren's at that time so of course I was freaking out inside wondering about what this meant for my past, present and future. 

I saw my Rheumatologist twice before deciding something very important:  I don't want to take medicine for the rest of my life.  Especially medicine with a potential to create a metallic buildup behind my eye (??).  I told her this and she encouraged me to search for answers in other ways--nutrition being a good start.  Now, unfortunately there are not that many specialists anymore that will not only accept your decision to not take a medicine but to support it and encourage doing it "naturally" or "holistically"... wow.  I like this lady.

I had been reading some books by Dr. Joel Fuhrman for some time at this point (thanks to my chiropractor who had been saving me from debilitating pain from two car accidents.) Dr. Fuhrman claimed that by eating a high nutrient diet and by taking away other foods, he had helped people with Lupus virtually rid themselves of symptoms.  Other doctors have been doing similar things by using nutrition to heal the body.  There must be something to this whole notion of re-fueling your body.

So here I am now.  Vegan as of the day after Christmas, suffering slightly emotionally from an intense longing for my cheese. I am sure it will get better--this is only the beginning of my journey.  But I absolutely cannot forget to focus on being well rounded.  That means working on my spiritual self (I am a devoted Christian) as well as on my mental health (working through my panic attacks and slight depression).  You will see more about these sides of me as I share more posts!

And now, adieu for now.  My husband and almost 4 year old son are playing hockey in my living room right in front of me... my husband all decked out in his goalie pads... this has bad idea written all over it.

Yours,
Kelly